Pat Robertson, frumious American Mullah

Pat Robertson’s hotline to God
Collapsed beneath the weight
Of messages directing Him
To expedite the fate
Of eastern sorts who hold Shabbats
And other kooks with swarthy looks
And world views quite unlike Pat’s.

You see, although Pat’s quite devout
He finds his patience has run out.
For years he’s stood and flapped his lips
Concerning the Apocalypse.
Last month he thought the time had come!
But it was just a lame eclipse.

Christ’s sake! For how long must Pat wait
To see the fruits of all the hate
Drummed up by him to escalate
A holy war to cleanse the earth
Of those whose souls have lesser worth.

(Pat’s known for holding grudges
And his thoughts are dark, on judges)
Fear not though! Pat loves all of you
So long as you are not a Jew,
Or think that God, for all of that
Perhaps could stand a Democrat